Double-Booked

Last night I busily plotted out my day today. I was scheduled for a brunch with friends then date number one at 2 PM followed by date number 2 at 430. I had thought out the timing, map quested the meeting locations and jotted down reminders - e.g. dates' names. I knew I was pushing it a little with double booking myself with two dates so close together, but, hey, I'm a seasoned dater so I thought I should be handle this no problem!

Midway through brunch today I realized I wasn't going to able to finish my dessert in time to get over to meet date number one. Fortunately, I had his number with me so I sent him a quick text to see if we could push the date back by half an hour and he was agreeable. Whew - close call! I also felt no qualms that I would be shortchanging him either, as he hadn't really spent that much time writing to me in the first place. I seem to have an intuitive algorithm that equates time spent setting up the date to time I need to spend with the guy on the first date.

After finishing my peach pecan crumble, I walked briskly over to the coffee shop where I was meeting Bachelor #1, hereby named The Checked-Shirt Guy. Running 8 minutes late, I slowed down my pace so I could saunter around the corner to the coffee shop so as to look calm and collected. Checked-Shirt Guy was waiting patiently outside for me. He was much more petite than I guessed from his pics. He was probably 5'6ish and was wearing a blue checked short sleeve dress shirt tucked into dark blue jeans. The tucking in of the shirt functioned unfortunately to make him seem even more short and also gave him a slightly nerdy and uptight feel as it was at 90 degrees out on a Saturday afternoon. I guess I like guys a bit more relaxed on a Sat. afternoon coffee date. Putting all of this out of my mind, I politely greeted him, and we went inside to order something. He got a coffee, and I got a lemonade. It's always on slightly awkward moment when I'm on a coffee shop date, and my date realizes I'm a bit of an oddity in that don't I don't drink coffee and have to forage for something else at these venues. I mean, really, would it kill a coffee shop if they had a soda fountain available. As a soda lover, I'm constantly surprised by the dearth of soda options at these caffeine-laden establishments. Sorry, I digress.

A few minutes after sitting down, I notice that he's doing most of the talking. I learn about where he grew up, went to college and what he's doing now. Slowly, I grow antsy - so I start competing for talk-time. I steer the conversation into more of a dialogue about likes, dislikes, current events, etc...instead of our biosketches. After awhile, I notice that our conversation has remained pretty dry - interesting, but no quick-witted back and forth conversation or bursts of laughter. I'm left feeling worried that we might not have enough to talk about the remaining half hour. Trying to avert my eyes quickly in search of clock - i really can't be late to my next date - I start thinking about how to find a bit of closure to our conversation. Thankfully, he saves me and says "so do you want to get out of here?" Casually, I respond, "sure," although in my mind that "sure" has an exclamation point following it. We walk to the nearest intersection where we amicably part ways.

Glancing at my cellphone, I see that I have forty minutes to make it to my next date, which leaves plenty of time for a nice stroll over to the Mall where I am meeting Bachelor #2. I arrive there early. For those of you who know me, I never arrive anywhere near early or even on time. It was a weird feeling - no stress, no anxiety, no guilt. Maybe I should strive for this again in the future. I stake out a bench to sit down on. After awhile it gets too hot there, so I take a stroll around the carousel just to make sure he's not standing on the other side and then sidle up to tree where I can find some shade. Another 15 minutes go by. He is most definitely late at this point, and I start to get slightly annoyed because, you know, the guy really should be on time, if not early, so that he's there to greet the girl when she arrives. Ok, so in reality, I got a good dose of what it feels like for other people who have to wait on me chronically. Karmic retribution was upon me, I was convinced. Finally, I make my last move over to another bench that's under a bit of shade. I then take out my phone and call a friend to see if she could log into my email account to find his cell number - yes, while I remembered to write down the first guy's number, I forgot to do this for the second guy. Just as my friend was ready to give me his number, he called me and said he was terribly sorry but he had been held up on the metro where there was no reception and that he would be there in two minutes.

When I see date number two, hereby called the Encroacher, I have a bit of a sinking feeling, that intuitive feeling that there's not going to be an attraction here. This feeling was probably compounded by the fact that by this point I was starting to get tired and didn't really feel like reiterating my bio again to someone else for the second time in one day. Lesson learned - don't double book! As planned, we headed off to visit one of the nearby museums. "Which one do you want to go to?" he asked. After checking to make sure he didn't have a preference, I suggested, "What about the Natural History Museum?" "Great," he responded. We were off; however, after a 10-minute walk, I realized we had walked in the wrong direction and so we then had to backtrack and continue on.

We toured the fossil exhibit, the mammal exhibit and the underwater exhibit. We spent an excruciating long time in the fossil exhibit. I had a bad feeling that he was pretty in to me, as he kept toddling up to me and ever so gently brushed up against me as we examined an exhibit closely, which is also when I noticed that he had slightly bad breath. At first I let the bumping slide. Then, after the 10th bump and lunge into my personal space, I started to feel encroached unfairly upon like when you're standing in a line and that person behind keeps bumping into you after every step and stop. I started leaving one foot out at a distance and then smoothly shifting my weight over to my other foot. This strategy proved quite effective in keeping him at bay. After we finished with the underwater exhibit, I led the way into the lobby area where there was a clock and said, "Oh, my, I guess I should be getting going, as I have to meet up with a friend soon." He seemed a little quiet on the way out but I tried my best to keep a lite conversation going. As we parted ways, I felt a sense of relief that my dating adventures were done for the day - double booking was way too tiring for me. I walked home in silent solitude and relished the feeling for that moment in time.

After writing all this up, I can't help but feel like maybe I was overly harsh with my assessment of the first guy. Maybe he's a bit shy and that's why the conversation wasn't as free flowing as I had wished; he did seem like a nice guy. And, maybe I could look past his tucked in shirt, too ;) Hmm...Maybe, if he calls, I'll give him a second chance.

Thoughts?

Welcome to Sass in the City!

Well, here it goes...I've been thinking about doing this blog for months now but haven't made any real headway. However, after a night out with my friends, I floated the idea to one side of the dinner table after noting how for some crazy, karmic reason or maybe the fact that fall is coming and guys may be looking for somone to snuggle up with on those inevitable cold winter nights ahead that I happen to have not 1, or 2 but 10 upcoming dates in the works. (Yes, I'm online.) After that fact filtered over to the other side of the dinner table and the "oh my god, that's a crazy number of dates" commentary slowed down and my face turned back to its normal complexion, the blog idea then surfaced to the group. They ran with it! They loved it! They wanted in. "Can we write stuff, as well?" We could rate your dates. We could ask questions and give suggestions. We can help you come up with a catchy tag line, etc...

So here goes it kids...I'm doing this for real! My vision of this is the following:

1. Record the dates - the who, what, when, where, how

2. Reflect on the guy in the spotlight - how'd he look, what was his personality, what does he do...

3. Note the memorable moments - the funny/startling/endearing stories that you tell your friends afterwards

4. Collect lessons learned - what can I and others get out of these dating adventures

5. Search for themes - patterns, synchronisity, pschological discoveries, a philosophy of dating and love

I hope to make this a fun, interactive and collaborative blogging site - so comments, please!